We asked Postman what it was like to grow up in a two-parent household and he talked about how he got to see all the ups and downs his parents went through and what that meant for him. Growing up in a two-parent household was a double-edged sword for him because of this, he recalls. When talking about his parents, he talked about what it was like having a father who was making his way through corporate America and going to college while being a husband and a father. His father’s journey led him to becoming a history teacher at a local school even after he retired. Postman explains that despite his father being so ambitious and busy, he was still there in times of need to give advice. “You have to play a part and play a role,” is what Postman said when talking about how he learned from his parents that you must be present in order to parent your kids well.
When asked what fatherhood meant to him, he said it means that you’re a: provider, protector, influencer and educator as well as a coach for your children.
Both Postman and Erv have gone through the challenges of having to co-parent. So, in this episode they discuss what they’ve learned and gone through in order to be effective at co-parenting. They talk about how the things that are important are communication and trust between both parents. Additionally, they talk about how it’s imperative to demolish the theories and ideas that men can’t be good parents or don’t have the “innate” parenting traits that women have. With this, they go into how important the role is as a father and the support fathers must have for their children.
Lastly, they dive into the need for more mental health acknowledgment within the black community. They discuss how illnesses like anxiety and depression are often overlooked and how that needs to change. Postman even says “ A lot of times black people don’t feel comfortable talking to therapies”. Then leading them into a discussion about how important it is for parents and children to have conversations about mental illness. This not only builds trust between parents and children, but it allows them to bond over the hardships that they face. Seeing how, both Postman and Erv, talk about how not only it is important for children to be honest about their mental health but for parents to be open about their struggles as well. Postman even makes a call out for black men to be more comfortable with acknowledging the mental health issues they might have and hesitations for going to therapy by saying, “Black men, it’s okay for you not feeling yourself and when you feel thrown off to go talk to someone.”
At the end of the episode, Postman’s last statements are about the importance of raising kids and having unity within the Black community. He says that it’s really important to raise kids because it will prevent the next Donald Trump as president. He says it’s important that we prevent children from being entitled and thinking that they have the authority to do whatever they want to even when they don’t deserve it.
This was our episode with Darin “Postman” Florence. We went through a lot of topics today, hard hitting topics that we hope will be relatable to some and helpful for others. We discussed the experiences living in a two-parent household, how to effectively co-parent, Postman’s experience as a father and his perspective on fatherhood and his opinion on how the Black community can do better when it comes to acknowledging mental health. This was a packed episode to say the least, with lots of information and perspective. We give a big thanks to Darin for having the time to join us on this episode and talking to us in depth about how to navigate raising children in this day and age.
